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millenniumfalcon.com • View topic - Skewls out four evar
It is currently July 10th 2020 2:46 pm




 
Post Posted: May 7th 2013 10:28 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 8th 2013 10:21 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 9th 2013 1:24 am
 
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Post Posted: May 9th 2013 7:07 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 9th 2013 10:35 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 10th 2013 7:50 pm
 
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Ha! I'm in debt up to my eyeballs on that. But, it's a pretty manageable trade-off.

I'm getting a degree in Mortuary Science. And before anyone goes "ewwww" let me just say this: Job. Security. Cuz' aint no robot or guy in a foreign country gonna' offer to do my job. Well, the robot maybe, I'm hoping to build/sell/retire off of that idea though. Hope nobody beats me to it. Plus, I look at it as a scientific endeavor, with a need for some artistic ability, communication skills, and an ability to go places and do things that would traumatize and scare the fuck out of the entire rest of the population of the planet. What I do, no one else will do. So it pays pretty good. I wondered when I started this job if I'd feel bad, making a living off of other people's misery. And I've decided I don't. I legitimately care about and respect people, and I mean that.

I got into this job right after my brother died. I think about how I felt going through that whenever I meet with someone, and I treat people how I would liked to have been treated back then but wasn't. I won't participate in outright ripping people off, but if I could even describe to you people what I do in a given week, which I can't, you'd see why I feel ok with getting a paycheck. Nobody would do this for free, even under the best of circumstances. Plus I gotta' buy the suit, and the gigantic customized Cadillac aint cheap either.

There are many people, especially oddly enough in the business, who don't see the value in the traditional Funeral service. People think it's a waste of money, and in a logical, frugal sense I understand that. But I'm not one of those fashionably humble people.

I want a god damned marching band, leading the legion of Stormtroopers who will carry the gigantic Viking ship I want to be buried in, down the street to the cemetery where my gigantic above ground crypt made of solid crystal blocks and gaudy gold accents will house my perfectly preserved remains Lenin-style for eons to come. But I'm kind of zany like that.


Post Posted: May 11th 2013 7:51 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 12th 2013 6:09 pm
 
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I am almost 40, so I doubt I'll be sprouting any higher than my current 5'10" stature. And I have suits that are colors other than black. I do possess super-human strength though, and I am a little zany. That's about where my resemblance to that guy ends. Besides, I like to think I run a classier service. In the Phantasm movies, everything looks kind of run down and shabby. He must not pay his people very well.



Post Posted: May 12th 2013 7:44 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 12th 2013 9:27 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 15th 2013 7:27 am
 
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Post Posted: May 15th 2013 8:58 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 15th 2013 10:42 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 17th 2013 2:04 am
 
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It would be a plus. There are sometimes a lot of bizarre obstacles.

Plus, there are certain BFOQ's attached after all. Equal opportunity laws being what they are, between discrimination and the risk of liability, liability is easier to get sued for. If I've got to hire a team of acrobatic little people they will have to be able to perform the job with "reasonable accommodations". If they team up and it doesn't work out, the Jones's or whoever's grandmother gets dumped down the stairs on accident will have the shirt off my back. And the Caddy. And none of that looks good on a job application.

On a mostly unrelated note, in the distant future I envision humans zipping around in some kind of hover-pod as both mass and personal transit. An individualized 'life-raft' of sorts. Bullet-proof and buoyant, these pod-like devices should generate electrical and motive power as well as provide basics like thermal control, breathable air, and water. When you die, they should detach the main compartment with you in it and bury that. Then people can stop being mad about me selling them a bitchin' casket they never see after we use it. I think it will look something like the 'abandoned for no good reason' Toyota concepts from a few years ago. There was a manufacturer bandwagon back then, but Toyota's was a really neat design I thought.

Casket of the future (sort of):


Goofy jumpsuit and Japanese heritage not required.

Speaking of great ideas shuttled to the dustbin by major manufacturers, an army of Q-rios still might be the most awesome idea ever:



But instead of doing something smart, or even something charitable like helping the poor, we do this kind of thing:



We are a bunch of selfish monkeys. Getting a job burying or molecularly reconstituting 'us' seems to be the only endeavor with a certain future these days.


Post Posted: May 18th 2013 5:13 pm
 
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Is that a Bhugatti police car?


Post Posted: May 20th 2013 11:13 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 21st 2013 1:19 am
 

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Post Posted: May 22nd 2013 7:20 am
 
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Yeah, but who are you going to impress riding a street missile troy? Now the Bughatti....people will stop just to look at it.


Post Posted: May 27th 2013 7:19 am
 
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Post Posted: May 29th 2013 9:20 pm
 
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Post Posted: May 31st 2013 11:59 pm
 
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Ha! Porn that pretends to have a story is so retro I just can't enjoy it anymore. I like when people just have at it on video. I don't need a screenplay, although I think a lot of more mainstream productions could do with some more eroticism. But the porn should just admit what it is.

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Post Posted: June 1st 2013 11:05 am
 
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So, you're a fan of xart.com then...


Post Posted: June 1st 2013 9:46 pm
 
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Post Posted: June 4th 2013 12:00 am
 
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Post Posted: June 4th 2013 11:28 pm
 
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