If I ever need crutches or a wheel chair to get around, I'm cutting my fucking legs off just below the knee and mounting modified 'pocket rocket' mini-bikes with numerous power take offs all over them. I mean, if they dont fucking work, their just getting in the way, so take the opportunity to upgrade. Besides, it's easier to change your own diaper without having to move whole legs when you can just fling your little stumps out of the way. And you'll never have to buy shoes again.
[marq=right] 'vroom-vroom' [/marq]
So the kid from "Christmas Story" didn't shoot his eye out with a BB gun after all. Instead, the BB somehow bounced off a couple of pieces of metal and lodged in his spine? Hmm.....sounds like there might have been a second gunman.
You'll shoot your eye out! You'll shoot your eye out!